BACK HOME IN CANADA 2006

Ah, the joys of traveling.  The joys of traveling with children.  The joys of traveling with children for two DAYS in a Minivan from San Jose to Maple Ridge then Gibsons, British Columbia.

VICTIMS:

• Melissa Bianco - wife and step-mom (or step-monster, depending on how long she'd be driving)
• Ron Bianco - husband and dad and enforcer
• Danielle Bianco - long-suffering teenager and eldest of three
• RJ Bianco - instigator and rule minder (but only to others, as rules were apparently forgot when he was breaking them)
• Nathan Bianco - frommage artist and victim of ire of elder brother and sister

MISSING VICTIM:

• Miko - Ron said I couldn't bring him.  *sniff*  (Though now that I think on it, a cat for 2 days in a car ONE-WAY is pretty ridiculous)

PRE-PLANNING:

Pre-planning.  Ha!  I laugh in the face of pre-planning.  (Actually, I wished I'd done more of it since as usual I was very short on underpants and completely forgot to bring most toiletries)

Ron managed to find a sitter for the cat.  Ron's dad, who happens to love Miko and came by each day to check on him, feed him, and scoop his unmentionables.  All three children needed passports and there was a last-minute rush to get these done (well of COURSE we knew about the trip months in advance, but you know how these things go...)

Ear plugs?  Did I consider them?  I surely did.  And they were stuck in my suitcase for the entire drive, though they presented great comfort to me when I was sleeping in a bed at night in a room with four other people.  Since neither Ron nor myself were entirely prepared for the drive with three children in various stages of car sickness, irritation, sleepiness, chattiness, disobedience, and sullenness, this trip proved to be a great eye opener. 

Since I knew that all of my mental faculties would be tested, I decided to make myself three promises for the trip.  Actually, I suggested all of us do the same.  Secret promises that we could each of us do, to make the trip more enjoyable.  My three?  As follows:

1. Drive carefully and pleasantly (no Mario Andretti action)
2. Be patient.
3. Be positive.

Well, after a weeklong trip, I can honestly say I managed to keep #1 the entire time.  Mostly.  At least, Ron only said, "I think I'm going to be sick, can you stop with the gas/brake action please?" a few times.  After that, I was ever mindful of my lead foot.

For the first hour or so Ron quizzed the kids continually, "Are you going to be sick?", "Don't be sick." "Do you have a bag?", "Who doesn't have a barf bag?", "Dramamine anyone?"  I thought  *I* was going to be sick.  I considered whispering, "Honey, have you ever heard of a self-fulfilling prophecy?  Enough with the barfing or they all will be heaving toast and fruit juice, myself included.", however, since I was no angel in the driving department (or the grouchy department), I decided to keep my yap shut.

The drive to Canada was interesting.  The last time we'd driven to Canada, Ron had just lost vision in his eye (a result of his MS) and refused to go to the hospital for steroid therapy, thus it was up to me to do the driving.  San Jose to Vancouver is roughly 900 miles.  Not a problem.  We had the minivan, we had snacks, and we had some fantasy/adventure book on audiotape.  The drive was effortless and, I am happy to report, not only did we NOT fight the entire trip, but we scarcely remembered the other was there.

This time, however, we were not nearly as prepared.  The boys had brought along their Nintendo DS's, but only Nathan remembered to unpack it so he could play.  We somehow in the last year LOST the remote to the Minivan's DVD player so although we could SEE the images, no one could hear anything.  What a waste, bringing two entire binders full of DVD's to not watch one of them.  Oh well, they had a lovely trip and got to visit Canada.  How nice for them.

I did have the foresight to bring my laptop.  I attempted to play on it for the 12 minutes Ron drove, but then put it away once I began feeling a little carsick myself.  Don't tell my family.  They think I have a cast iron stomach and will to match.

All in all, as far as children go, they were fairly well behaved.  No one tossed any one else out of the moving vehicle, no one lost any body parts, and there was no bloodshed.  There was, however, quite a bit of, "If you don't stop complaining I am going to take that DS away for the rest of the trip.", and "So-and-so stop bothering your brother/sister or I'm turning this vehicle around RIGHT NOW.", and even a few, "I am NEVER taking you on a trip again."

MAPLE RIDGE:

We stayed at my sister's house for a few days, long enough for the cousins to meet (they'd never met their younger cousins Kade and Savannah), get to know each other, become best of friends, and irritate the crap out of each other.  I kid.  They adored each other, even when they didn't.

Ron and I wisely stayed at a hotel rather than with my sister and her three kids because while The Brady Bunch may be a fine televsion program, the reality show sucks harshly.  I did not wish to inflict my brood on her nor be inflicted with two sub-five year olds tossing slobbery half-eaten grapes at me at 6 a.m. to wake me from my slumber.  Plus, hotels have air conditioning and I am, admittedly, built for comfort.  Unfortunately, someone forgot to tell the Best Western that and we were placed in a bed with a mattress made of hard lumber.  BUT, we had AC, so there you go.

The first order of business upon arriving at the hotel around 10 p.m., besides checking in, going potty, and claiming which bed belonged to whom, we drove down the street to White Spot and ate one of my favourite of all time burgers.  I had a Legendary Burger with cheese, fries and gravy (with a bottle of white vinegar at my disposal), and a Coke.  Mmmmmmm..   White Spot's special sauce.  I don't care what it is, it's wonderful and I am desperately disappointed that they don't have them here in California.

We went to sleep, woke up, and drove four blocks to go visit my sister and her family.  Ron and I ended up taking the kids (except Savannah, since she's too young to enjoy such things) to the Corn Maze just down the street in Maple Ridge.  We had some luck in that it was Kids' Day and all the attractions were free with the price of admission. 

Ron and I ventured in for roughly 10 minutes, looked at each other and said, "What are we doing?", turned around again, and spent the next 20 minutes trying to find our way out.

This we did, much to our relief.

The kids wandered in and our of the maze several more times until they had punched every last stamp on their cards.  Ron and I considered paying off some 10-year old for theirs and bragging we'd done it as well, only faster, but thought better of it.  (I didn't feel like coughing up the cash)

After the maze, we headed over to the Climbing Wall where the kids made their way up and down the wall with varying degrees of success.  Kade (the kid in yellow) was much more interested in the slide.  Nathan, courage and the heart of a lion, in theory climbed the wall over fifteen times, however, he never really reached beyond 7 feet above the ground -- however, he did the same course at least twenty times.  Eric (black shirt), Danielle (only girl), and RJ (orange shirt) all climbed the wall and found it fairly easy.

Back home for a quick visit: